Refrain of the poetry of life and relationships.
Life is universal energy manifested through various vibrations.
Every vibration of every action or reaction or situation is based on relationship i.e. how we relate to/with other persons and things and every relationship is based on reciprocation.
I feel in the ultimate analysis everything is about how we relate with others, with things, with ideologies, with various identities, with the whole environment etc that is going to determine our role and relevance in the world and in our own life.
The poetry of life and relationship in general has some inherently important, interesting and inevitable refrain. They are broadly as given below and therefore during the course of this write up they may be repeated often:-
1. That everyone and everything is interconnected, inter related and interdependent in at least some aspects and with varying degrees of intensity.
2. Everything must be evaluated based on contextual relevance and contribution to life as a whole [which implies the whole physical environment as well as psychological and social environment].
3. Every aspect of life has its own intrinsic and inherent attributes/merits which must be smoothly aligned with life and its myriad relationships through proper attitudes.
It is preferable to immerse any topic or subject matter, primarily and basically with its intrinsic elements/components/aspects/attributes intact, into a cauldron which has a mixture of all these- knowledge based analysis, limited perception based on frames of reference and scales of observation, skepticism , criticism, intellectual scrutiny, compassionate emotionalism, humane socialism, rational thinking, contextual relevance [ which includes too many components] , traditions, practical viability, psychological comfort, aesthetic sensitivity, scientific scrutiny etc and churn the cauldron without clinging on to any particular restrictive social, cultural or political or religious identity.
This process inevitably will bring out lot of outputs. We can exercise our freedom and sometimes select and choose some of the outputs. Sometimes the outputs will draw us.
Sometimes away from all or any of our intended searches and seeking, outside the circle of these known paradigms, almost tangentially serendipity will drag us to an oasis of serene clarity.
At all costs the intrinsic attributes must be the predominant factor so that whatever is thrown into the cauldron and however it is churned, the ultimate output must include those attributes so that evaluation is not distorted or desperately doctored to fit into any predefined and expected outcome.
So what pans out ultimately depends on various factors and aspects some of which are explainable within the ken of logical and rational thinking but some are beyond these.
We can also observe uneasily how the human intellect polished by a rare faculty [compared to other species] of conscious awareness, capacity to think, store the knowledge, retrieve it for reference etc, is mostly, unwilling to take the risk of accepting the uncertain; the intellectually undecipherable and the inexplicable outcomes, even if such acceptance is branded, extolled and promoted as virtues of humility or modesty.
All said and done life has to be enjoyed through living and relationships have to be experienced in the churning process of life. We cannot mask them with any mumbo- jumbo or avoid them through any other means, imaginations, dreams etc however well packaged or marketed or sanctified they may be.
What is happening to relationships now?
Unfortunately, to use the commercial jargon, there is a paradigm shift in viewing relationship by some people of the present generation.
They compartmentalize relationship into different categories. They categorize relationship on a graph as useful, usable, allowing to be used and proportionately their different relationships get disturbed, degraded and destroyed. The more and more they allow themselves to be used for something by someone then it can gradually lead to depression and can at times even become deadly.
They think if betrayal can benefit why not give a kick to gratitude. They have no qualms about placing selfish personal comforts and gratifications over everything else.
That’s why relationships are researched with more emphasis on the prefixes and/or suffixes that are attached to them like marital relationship, professional relationship, family relationship, emotional relationship, intellectual relationship etc.
These prefixes /suffixes indicate certain specific situations/contexts and certain elements /aspects/factors which predominate in a relationship. They do not define the totality of a relationship. For example in a professional relationship one may not deal only with purely professional /official matter one will also be concerned about the personal welfare or circumstances either sad or happy one of the other with whom one is professionally engaged. Similarly by emotional relationship it does not mean just any particular emotion but also all other factors that form part of the relationship.
Relationships are not nets meant to get entangled but great networks of connectivity to catch completeness and gain from totality of everything because all are interconnected, inter related and interdependent in at least some aspects and with varying degrees of intensity.
But all relationships irrespective of the prefixes and suffixes they carry are based on certain time tested universal principles and certain humane values, it is these values which are the many facets that give the shine to relationships.
Living with certain humane values in our day to day life is worthier than any other great achievement. We do not need any expertise or special qualification or sanctions to practice these values. For example sentiments of caring and sharing, if not towards all, at least towards people related to us and whom we come across in life is very important because the impact of such values and principles are too tangible, stark and stinging at times.
Even when we are aware of all the components of relationships we cannot either make collages or collations and deal with relationship but as mentioned earlier life carries on its constant churning process through various aspects and unfortunately we are aware of only some aspects because of our selective frames of references and all other limitations.
So we must strive to live by certain positive values that we may have inherited and/or acquired and also try our best to bequeath the same to our children.
Very often people take the route of blaming the circumstances becomes an easy excuse and say because of various sufferings, problems, frustrations, failures etc they could not lead a life with certain positive values. Similarly some people who become a little prosperous in their life either in power, pelf or position, they let everything disappear under their super imposing ego which gets so inflated that they are clouded by a false sense of immortality to external things quiet oblivious of the mortal frame which houses such ego.
What no one realizes is that we are all after all we have a mortal frame made of biochemical organisms which are bound to decay and die one day and even that like our birth is, in most cases, not chosen by us, but happens all the same.
Reality is harsh and humbling in many ways. All of us always do what we can, what we want to and what we are destined to do. At times one or some of these things predominate over the rest. But irrespective of any of these three i.e. what we can, want to and destined to do, the platform from which we perform them are our inherent attributes and our attitudes.
Unless these two are tuned properly the frequency at which we may encounter life will be jarring and make us realize things the very harsh way.
So, living with certain humane values at all times preferably with everyone is the best reciprocation we can make to the other souls.